Sorostitute Superlatives 5.0

Hello All, 

Time once again for one of my favorite posts of the year...Sorostitute Superlatives!

I always recommend enjoying these with a nice Long Island Iced Tea or two. Of course, only after you inhale 3 Sprinkles cupcakes for lunch and then skip dinner...you know, 'cus you're dieting (JUST KIDDING...shout out to all my Zetas and DGs and them)

MOST LIKELY TO BE CHAPTER PRESIDENT

Jermaine Grace

1.)    Jermaine Grace – LB(Sean Spence-like)

2.)    Al – Quadin Muhammad – DE (Future First Round Pick)

3.)    Stacey Coley – WR (Lot of Chad Johnson comparisons, and I like them)

4.)    Beau Sandland – TE (Tape reminiscent of Shockey)

5.)    Artie Burns – CB/S(Maybe the highest ceiling in this class)

TOP 5 SLEEPERS

1.)    Sunny Odogwu – OT (Is this our next McKinnie?)

2.)    Ufamba Kamalu – DL (Stores and stores of untapped potential in a huge frame)

3.)    Ray Lewis III – ATH (Would never bet against this kid)

4.)    Alex Gall – OL (The type of mauler you build o-lines around)

5.)    Alex Figueroa – LB(Loves to run around and hit; the next Eddie Johnson?)

THE ONES THAT GOT AWAY

Al Golden is right…too much of signing day was spent complaining about the players we didn’t get. I agree with him, and I think too little time was spent considering how awesome the kids that chose to sign with Miami are. That said, it is good to have in the record the kids we all freaked out about not getting, if for no other reason than to look back at in a few years and see how it all turned out. 

1.)    Matt Thomas – LB, FSU(AKA Marvin Jones II)

2.)    Jay – Nard Bostwick – DT, UiF (My favorite DT in the entire class; Miami lead the whole time)

3.)     Alex Collins – RB, Arkansas (Very similar style to Clinton Portis)

4.)    Jayron Kearse – ATH, Clemson(Freak athlete who could be anything from a receiver to an outside linebacker)

5.)    Skai Moore – LB, Cackalacky (Undersized, but just makes plays; grew up a ‘Canes fan)

BEST FASHION CHOICE

Stacey Coley, rocking the Orange and Green "SWAG" hat, seen at right.

BEST BIG AND LITTLE

That would go to Kevin Olsen and his older brother, former 'Cane great Greg Olsen. One time for old time's sake: ZLAM!

TWO PEAS IN A POD

Kamalu and Odogwu are of the same tribe in Nigeria. They are both physical freaks...literally just massive human beings. Hakuna matata motha fucka.

DADDY'S BOY

We hope, Ray Lewis III. Because if he is there are going to be some caved in facemasks.

BETTER LATE THAN NEVER

Miami signing dual sport studs Ryheem Lockley, Derrick Griffin and Corn Elder after signing day sent a strong message that this staff never quits and will always find talent. And oh yeah, adds three pretty stellar athletes to the class as well. 
   

BEST QUOTE (Anyone reading this blog, he is probably speaking to you)

"There's going to be a lot of people who didn't stand with us who are going to be remembered for not standing with us," Golden said. "'I Stand With The U' means this is tough right now. This is about as tough as it gets in our business. We've got a bunch of coaches and players that are digging in and rather than running are going to fight their way out of it. Now do you stand with us or not? And that is the truth. That is the truth. From my heart, that is the truth."

This was after Al Golden absolutely went Nas on the Miami beat writers and Ethered them for asking stupid, repetitive questions at his press conference…most of which had to do with players Miami didn’t sign. Christ I love this man.

BEST QUOTE #2

"I have a laptop, a couple of clothes, my running shoes and that's it," he said. "My things I want or need, I never had them. Right now it's not my priority. My priority is to get to school and ball out."

Asked if he hopes his roommate brings a TV, Odogwu simply said, "I haven't watched TV for six months, and growing up I didn't have a TV."

"As a freshman I expect to learn everything I can, stay on top of my work, stay on track all the time which I always do," he said. "I'll give my coaches hell to teach me because I want to learn the game. I'll learn all I can. I'll learn the terminology, everything."

Odogwu said, "Oh, gosh, let me tell you: We're coming back. I promise you that. For me, I'm excited. I know how to fight, don't quit. I know everybody wants to bring the name (Miami) back. We're going to go there and take care of business."

Is there any doubt that Sonny Odogwu is going to be a beast?

BIGGEST CREEP

Gatewood takes over and answers the question for him. Saying that AlexCollins has always wanted to be a feature back and not in a "RB by committee" and that was always the draw of Wisconsin.

I mean, anytime you are a grown man and can literally hijack the interview of a 17 year old kid, you have to do it, right?

BEST QUOTE #3

"If im from Cincinnati, Ohio and see that Miami is doing something special how come kids from Florida can't see it?"

This was from Alex Gall’s Twitter. That is a True ‘Cane, ladies and gentlemen.

BEST QUOTE #4

“At Arkansas, I definitely expected some things to be unexpected.”

-Denver Kirkland, on his reason for choosing Arkansas. I…I mean…whatever you say Denver.

BEST QUOTE #5

“I wanted my family to be able to watch me play, so FSU should be good for that.”

-Matthew Thomas, a Miami native.

BEST QUOTE #6

"Hey im sure he did whats best for his future and I cant blame him. I wouldnt wanna compete against me either."

That's Jermaine Grace, when asked about Matt Thomas.   

BEST COMEDY OF ERRORS

Maybe the greatest of all time was Alex Collins suiting up for his Signing Day Ceremony, then disappearing, then the school revealing that Collins’ mother had absconded with his LOI and no one knew where she was. Mama wanted him at Miami, and she knew without her signature Collins couldn’t go to Arkansas, whom he had announced for on Monday night after giving his pledge to Miami coaches earlier in the day. 

Collins responded by getting his (apparent) absentee father to sign his LOI, holding a press conference this morning in a camouflage jacket (talk about rubbing it in to ‘Canes fan, right?), and announcing once more for Arkansas. His mom did not attend, but she DID hire a lawyer from the Cochrane Group. Yes, Johnny Cochrane’s name has now made its way in to this recruiting saga. 

The only thing that would make this better is if Tyler Perry showed up playing a bad cop or something. One day there should be a 30 for 30 on this. “What if I told you that sometimes, a mother’s love knows no bounds…”

THAT'S GONNA LEAVE A MARK...LITERALLY

Rueben Foster originally committed to Alabama. He then switched to the hometown Auburn Tigers, whom he loved so much, he had their logo tattooed on his person. We all know where this is going. Gene Chizik and staff got fired at Auburn, and Foster re-opened his commitment. He signed with...Alabama. Auburn's arch-rival. The lesson, as always...17 and 18 year olds are stupid.

BEST MESSAGE BOARD POST (From TheFranchise on CanesInsight)

This new group of Canes reminds me of some old Hurricanes. Guys like Dan Morgan, Nate Webster, and Ed Reed and Santana and Reggie immediately come to mind. Those guys wanted to be Hurricanes, and they were grinders and hard-nosed guys. They came here when it wasn't the popular thing to do.

When those guys came here we were in the midst of dealing with the repercussions of our last struggle with the NCAA. The Orange Bowl was empty. We would go to games where there was literally 3,000 people in the stands no matter what the announced attendance was. But Freckles Davis, who was a monster at evaluating character, found a group of talented guys who, more importantly, were determined guys. They weren't 5 star guys, and they weren't front-runners; they were guys with that inner drive to succeed that is so tough to evaluate. Our program is in similar condition these days. Our stadium is empty. We aren't the "it" program. But Al managed to find a group of guys who are very talented, and who, most importantly, are no-nonsense grinders who want to be here and relish the opportunity to be Canes.

Look at guys like Carter and Burns and Coley. How much twitter f****try did they engage in? How much diva shyt did they pull? How many times did they commit and de-commit or try to "troll" the coaches and fans?

Think about Alex Gall. Then, think about Martin Bibla, who was a rough and tumble dude from Pennsylvania. Does anyone think that Gall will be anything but a success with his grit and toughness? Come on. This dude's about as close to a guaranteed on the OL as you will find. F#ck the fat 4 star with the puzzy attitude who will cash his chips if things don't go his way. Give me this mean sumbytch any day of the week.

Think about Standish Dobard and how badly he wanted to be a Cane. And this dude has skills to go along with it. When the chips are down, these are the guys who will make plays when the divas are quitting because it's too hot or too tough.

Think about Kevin Olsen, who never got shook even when Fisch split. Then, think about Ken Dorsey.

Think about Gus Edwards, and then harken back to a different era with Steve McGuire or Alonzo Highsmith. Tough dudes with skill.

How about Sonny? You think there's any chance that dude will let himself fail? His mom sleeps in dirt, and his little brother got kidnapped by a 200 pound mosquito last week. This dude is fighting for real life shyt, not thinking about some dumb shyt he can say on twitter. Big Bryant McKinnie was playing the tuba a couple years before he got here. He wasn't a hugely heralded guy.

I applaud our new group of guys and can't wait to see them develop.

I think that sums it up pretty nicely.